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Religious or Non Religious Wedding Ceremony?

Mark Turansky • Nov 13, 2023

What if the bride and groom have two different faiths?

Deciding whether to have a religious or non-religious wedding is a personal choice that depends on your beliefs, values, and preferences as a couple. If religious, what religion? You could have to compromise if you are of different religions or beliefs! It may be an option to agree to an interfaith marriage, whereby a professional officiant creates a customized ceremony to honor each of your faiths.


Here are some factors to consider when making this decision:


1.    Personal Beliefs: If you and your partner have strong religious beliefs and wish to incorporate them into your wedding ceremony, a religious wedding may be more appropriate. It can provide a meaningful and spiritual experience that aligns with your values.


2.    Family and Cultural Expectations: Consider the expectations of your families and cultural background. Religious ceremonies may be important to them, so discussing your options and finding a middle ground that respects everyone's wishes can be beneficial.


3.    Inclusivity: If you have guests from diverse religious backgrounds or if you identify as non-religious, a non-religious wedding ceremony can be more inclusive and welcoming for everyone. It allows you to focus on your love and commitment without specific religious traditions.


4.    Flexibility: A non-religious wedding ceremony provides you with more flexibility to personalize the event according to your preferences. You have the freedom to incorporate readings, poems, music, or other elements that hold personal significance to you as a couple.


5.    Officiant Availability: Consider the availability of an officiant who can perform the type of ceremony you desire. Some officiants may specialize in religious ceremonies, while others may be experienced in conducting non-religious or secular ceremonies.


6.    Legal Requirements: Ensure that you are aware of any legal requirements or obligations surrounding your wedding ceremony, such as obtaining a marriage license or following specific guidelines set by your jurisdiction.

Ultimately, the decision whether to have a religious or non-religious wedding should be based on what feels authentic and meaningful to you as a couple. It may be helpful to have open and honest conversations about your beliefs and expectations to ensure that both partners are comfortable with the decision.



When I work with a couple I always ask the question: “Do you want a religious or nonreligious wedding ceremony?" For me, religious is defined by using scripture, mention of God and a dedication prayer. A nonreligious wedding is defined by me as no mention of God and a generic, heartfelt, secular dedication recited before the kiss.

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Elopement or big wedding? The choice between elopement or a big wedding ultimately depends on your personal preferences and circumstances. Here are some factors to consider: Intimacy: Elopements are usually more intimate and focus solely on the couple, allowing for a private and romantic experience. Big weddings, on the other hand, involve more guests and can be more social and interactive. Cost: Elopements tend to be more budget-friendly as they often involve fewer expenses like venue rentals, catering, and decorations. Big weddings, on the other hand, can be more expensive due to the larger guest list and additional services. Planning and stress: Elopements typically require less planning and coordination, making them less stressful. Big weddings often involve more details and logistics, which may require more time and effort to organize. Importance of traditions: Big weddings often involve various cultural and religious traditions, along with customary rituals like exchanging vows in front of family and friends. If these traditions are significant to you, a big wedding may be the better choice. Guest preferences: Consider the desires and expectations of your close family and friends. Some people might feel disappointed or left out if they are not invited to a big wedding, while others may appreciate the more intimate nature of an elopement. Ultimately, it's important to choose the option that makes you and your partner happiest. Consider discussing your preferences, budget, and expectations with each other to make an informed decision. With my personal experience, I have seen couples relish the moment and each other when the wedding is just them on the beach, toes in the sand. The small, intimate affair seems to take on more a more personal approach. Often, couples will elope here in Hawaii and then have a family/friend ceremony where they live afterwards.
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